Why I say “NO!” to my kids

I know there’s a whole thing now where people have stopped saying “NO” to their kids. I agree that there are times where saying no might not be the appropriate response, but never saying no is ridiculous to me and here’s why.

1. Society deserves better! Never saying no sets a precedent for entitlement. You CAN’T always do what you want to do when you want to do it. If our three-year-old hits his brother in the face, I’m not going to tell him to “better use his energy doing something else” I’m gonna say NO! Im gonna say it in a d#%kish tone, too! Because he has to live in society. He can’t hit his brother, he can’t hit anyone. I want the word know to haunt his dreams when he thinks of doing something unacceptable. People are like “I have a better relationship with my kid now that I stopped saying it”…. ummmm of course. Why would you not adore someone that lets you behave poorly with impunity.
2. He will hear “NO!” in the real world. He needs to know what it means. If his boss says “no, that’s not allowed”, he needs to know that there are rules when you work for someone else, and that he needs to abide by certain rules. He needs to know certain behaviors are wrong!
3. You don’t have to yell to say no. Its so easy to say no. It feels good to see your child connect a naughty behavior with the word no, too. He knows it as age two, he knew it by 18 months, he will still know what “NO!” means when he’s 30. I’m not hurting his development, that’s bullshit, I’m creating a person who appreciates the word yes when he hears it, BECAUSE HE HEARS THE WORD NO!
4. He will know how to say no when something doesn’t feel right. If someone touches my kid or hurts my kid in ANY way, I want his hand to come up in front of him and form a stop gesture and I want the FIRST thing out of his mouth to be NO! If we treat no like a four letter word, we can’t possibly expect our kids to use the word when they need to.

I agree with not using it always. I say slow down instead of don’t run sometimes. “Sure, you can be a superhero when you grow up” I’m not here to crush dreams, I’m not going to say no to things that aren’t dangerous or that won’t cost him a job as an adult, but YES, YES YES YES I say NO! to my kids. I will always say it, even if I don’t need to say it often. They need to know what it means.